One brazen New Yorker has taken it upon himself to shatter the record 11 times Jay-Z and Kanye West performed “Niggas in Paris” in Vancouver by going H.A.M. and screeching the Watch the Throne song over, and over, and over again for an audience of subway riders. This dude, with his matching purple jacket and luggage, is definitely goin’ gorillas, so it’s fitting that he passionately delivers the line, “I’m supposed to be locked up too” with a sense of urgency usually reserved for unstable.
In addition to trying to break records, this ‘Ye and Jay-loving (and purple-loving!) citizen also creates the best fitness routine since Bon Iver’s “Lift/Rest.” The Niggas in Paris” Workout is a pretty simple way to burn calories: First, nervously shake your right leg back and forth, as if you have no control over your own appendages. Then, with the iPod in your left hand, pump your right fist in the air. After one verse, switch the iPod to your right hand and raise your left arm. Most importantly, scream out the lyrics as loudly as you can for as long as you can without inhaling. Finally, for the cool down, wobble around with hands on hips, glance toward the people with their cell phones out, and ask “What, they recording?” If all goes well, you’ll be sweating more than if you actually performed “Paris” 11 consecutive times onstage. Thanks to Tom Breihan’s Twitter for bringing this man into our lives.