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Towers of London Singer Turned Snarky Gossiper

Towers of London singer (and celebrity Big Brother contestant) Donny Tourette is a guest columnist in today’s gossip section of U.K. rag The Mirror. He begins with a vitriolic kiss-off to the column’s usual editors, delivering what he calls “the lowdown — rock’n’roll style.”

He encourages readers to enjoy his hate-list column of rock phoneys — which goes down best with a “fucking large drink” — and launches into tirades against those “drab” Arctic Monkeys (“fucking wankers,” if you catch his drift), Keane’s Tom Chaplin (whose stint in rehab Tourette views as a publicity stunt), and Lily Allen (“She’s not very classy, I don’t like her music”).

Charlotte Church also makes his list of class-less lasses, while Amy Winehouse, Pete Doherty, and the Gallaghers are the only artists the singer wants to hit the town with. “That would be ace,” Tourette writes of that sure-to-be-debaucherous get-together. “Or pandemonium more like!”

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Head to for Donny Tourette’s guest gossip column.

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Towers of London, “How Rude She Was”

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