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Finally, An Interview Where Morrissey Doesn’t Say Anything Insane

Morrissey has managed to do what may have recently seemed impossible and given an interview where he doesn’t sound like an Infowars host. Granted, the interview took place with Rolling Stone writer Rob Sheffield, who has something in common with Morrissey–a deep, uncompromising love of Morrissey. It was also conducted over email, which means that the “Bigmouth Strikes Again” singer may have had the time to actually choose his words more carefully.

Sheffield’s correspondence with Moz is a nice reminder that when the former Smiths frontman isn’t behaving like a walking Facebook post, he can actually be funny. Case in point, the singer made this quip about his nostalgia for his childhood home. From Rolling Stone:

If you could go back to one room you’ve left behind, what room would you return to? (And who would be there?)

I dream constantly about my old bedroom in Manchester. I am always there, it is always 8:35 and time to walk to school, toppling into ditches of rain. Picture a swan being shot during flight

If there’s anyone who radiates a swanlike grace, it’s Morrissey.

The notorious curmudgeon may have had a change of heart when it comes to his outspoken aversion to sex. In 2006, he told NME that he was “no longer celibate,” but didn’t provide any further details about his private life. In 2013, he released a confounding statement regarding his sexuality. From Morrissey fan site True to You, which typically acts as a de facto platform for the singer. “Unfortunately, I am not homosexual. In technical fact, I am humasexual. I am attracted to humans. But, of course … not many“.

If what he told Rolling Stone is true, it sounds like he’s finding a lot more humans attractive these days. Of course, he also sounds like he’s talking in riddles:

What kind of connection do you feel with your audience?

We are full-blooded lovers. This is why I have decided to devote the rest of my life to lust. You reach a point in life where you must go further than just looking. It’s all in the interest of science, of course.

Sure.

Considering that Morrissey’s political beliefs border on fascism, it’s a relief to read that he doesn’t actually vote.

Have people evolved in any way during your lifetime?

Meaning the human race, generally? Well, because of food enlightenment, yes – it’s clear to everyone how the dairy industry is a bigger threat to the planet that the nuclear arms race. People are sick of animal slaughter. My final aim is to abolish the abattoir, and although I haven’t ever once voted in a general election, my vote awaits any party intelligent enough to ban the slaughterhouse. Only at that point would the world begin to grow up.

Sheffield may have very have scored one of the last print interviews with the singer, as he recently swore them off because he claims German publication Der Spiegel misquoted statements he made defending alleged sexual predators Harvey Weinstein and Kevin Spacey.

That’s probably a good decision. Here’s hoping he sticks with it.