Like every decade, the ’90s had its cathartic heights. And like the ’60s, it seemed like a period in which the culture was moving forward, albeit fitfully, toward a more progressive, enlightened future, at least in our fuzz-pedal-hazy minds. But it was also a decade of repulsive depths, craven money-grabs, and Pauly Shore’s film career. One could make a strong case — and we’ll do so here — that it was actually a cesspool of prissy repression and recklessly moronic freedom that now stands as an embarrassment to one and all. So, we’re here today to finally snuff out your final flicker of nostalgia for the decade that killed Kurt Cobain and allowed Howard Stern to survive, marry a worshipful model, and make $500 million. Hey ’90s, go hump a moose. CHARLES AARON

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