Rihanna’s ‘Diamonds’ Video: ‘Unapologetic’ Adult Contemporary

Rihanna's "Diamonds" video

Rihanna’s Facebook interview last night suggests the 24-year-old singer has, understandably, not yet exactly come to terms with the mundane realities of one day waking up over the hill. What she wants in 30 years, she said, is to be “skinny,” to be “fierce,” and that her “tits are still sitting up,” because, she explained, “Nothing else will matter at that point.” Now that Rihanna’s current single “Diamonds” has been around for several weeks, it’s becoming clear that it, like this quote, is an example of the pop powerhouse conceptualizing maturity but somehow failing to grasp its true essence.

The mellow self-affirmation jam’s video is here now, and despite the Chris Brown-like tattooed arm, or what appears to be Rihanna rolling a joint full of diamonds, or the intermittently blazing flames, it’s a confirmation of Rihanna’s awkward segue into adult-contemporary-dom. At one point a stallion is running in slow motion through the plains. Later, there are two stallions! But mostly the focus, as the world swirls chaotically, is Rihanna’s face, her intensely serious expressions only underscoring the undeniable fact that the song’s would-be inspirational chorus is basically “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star” without the annoyingly catchy melody.

As Rihanna gets set to deliver us her November 19 LP Unapologetic, including an inevitable trolly appearance by the actual Chris Brown, she is also preparing her globe-trotting “Diamonds” arena tour. As Pitchfork points out, she’s bringing along with her none other than her “Cockiness” remix guest rapper A$AP Rocky, who grabbed the RiRi derriere at the MTV Video Music Awards and whose youthful energy is in a very real way the opposite of “adult contemporary.” Rihanna chose Pretty Flacko because she wants her crowd to look “hyped as shit,” she explains in the backstage video below. Oh A$AP, where have you been all her life?


Rihanna’s 2013 tour with A$AP Rocky:
March 8 – Buffalo, NY @ First Niagara Center
March 10 – Boston, MA @ TD Garden
March 12 – Baltimore, MD @ 1st Mariner Arena
March 14 – Philadelphia, PA @ Wells Fargo Center
March 15 – Hartford, CT @ XL Center
March 17 – Montreal, Quebec @ Bell Centre
March 18 – Toronto, Ontario @ Air Canada Centre
March 21 – Detroit, MI @ Joe Louis Arena
March 22 – Chicago, IL @ United Center
March 24 – St. Paul, MN @ Xcel Energy Center
March 25 – Winnipeg, Manitoba @ MTS Centre
March 27 – Edmonton, Alberta @ Rexall Place
March 30 – Calgary, Alberta @ Scotiabank Saddledome
April 1 – Vancouver, British Columbia @ Rogers Arena
April 3 – Seattle, WA @ Key Arena
April 6 – San Jose, CA @ HP Pavilion
April 8 – Los Angeles, CA @ Staples Center
April 9 – Anaheim, CA @ Honda Center
April 11 – San Diego, CA @ Valley View Casino Center
April 12 – Las Vegas, NV @ Mandalay Bay
April 15 – Houston, TX @ Toyota Center
April 16 – Dallas, TX @ American Airlines Center
April 19 – Tampa, FL @ Tampa Bay Times Forum
April 20 – Ft. Lauderdale, FL @ BankAtlantic Center
April 22 – Atlanta, GA @ Philips Arena
April 29 – Washington, D.C @ Verizon Center
May 2 – Ottawa, Ontario @ Scotiabank Place
May 4 – Brooklyn, NY @ Barclays Center
May 5 – Brooklyn, NY @ Barclays Center


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