The world has unwittingly received a glimpse of an alternate reality where ’00s rockers Hoobastank are social media geniuses. Imposters pretending to be ‘Stank created an account that was accidentally verified by Twitter recently. Apparently this is not the first time the microblogging service has incorrectly identified the veracity of an account, but the Fake Hoobastank was pretty brilliant.
A real (and vastly more boring) Hoobastank account is now properly noted, but BuzzFeed caught the deranged impostor account’s verified status before Twitter realized their error. While we mourn having to return to the reality wherein Hoobastank are still boring ol’ Hoobastank (according to their real Twitter account, they recorded something in January “because they can,” though whether that’ll be released remains unknown), enjoy a few choice cuts from the fake @hoobastank_band’s feed. If Hoobastank were actually this entertaining, they’d have a seriously good chance of making a comeback.
pretty crazy all them bottles of Cristal from the Bun B Booze Cruise gonna end up bein dope ass sea glass for some lucky undersea shorties..
— Hoobastank!!(@hoobastank_band) December 14, 2011
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it drives me fucking crazy that only one person in the world has ever landed an anderson cooper 360°
— Hoobastank!!(@hoobastank_band) January 18, 2012
Reject this world! Retreat inward, to the mancave of the mind
— Hoobastank!!(@hoobastank_band) December 27, 2011
I’d like to go a single fucking day without having to read about the deplorable actions of America’s illegal Spy Kids organization.
— Hoobastank!!(@hoobastank_band) December 3, 2011
Hesse left his eharmony account logged in on the laptop. Fave bands: Dishwalla Chumba but NO HOOB! fucked up!! Fave film: Goonies lol u homo
— Hoobastank!!(@hoobastank_band) December 1, 2011
POPPPIN BOTTLES AT MIDNIGHT..!! Happy Four Hundred TWentieth Anniversary of Your Death Pope Leo X Its Your Big Day
— Hoobastank!!(@hoobastank_band) December 1, 2011
And finally…
just for the record…… we were dubstep wayyy before KoЯn was dubstep.
— Hoobastank!!(@hoobastank_band) November 30, 2011
