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Disco Inferno, ‘The 5 EPs’ (One Little Indian)

Form a bleak, driving post-punk band like Joy Division. Take it down a notch. Get a sampler. Replace drums with the sound of wind, water, traffic, and breaking glass. Undermine your guitar with a cloud of effects. Sing like you talk. Be cold and beautiful, but retain harsh noise and the word “fuckers” — unchecked beauty is what killed Romanticism. Do it in the early ’90s U.K., when everyone was reheating Beatles leftovers dressed up with processed drums. Start out weird, get weirder, and end up being the missing link between two things that never happened.