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Kevin Martin Crowned Chairman of the FCC

In an utterly predictable move, President Bush promoted current conservative FCC member Kevin Martin to the vacant post at the head of the regulatory government agency. Martin has been a staunch supporter of the recent crackdowns on indecency in the post-Nipplegate world. He replaces the departing chief, Michael K. Powell, the son of Colin and a remnant from the halcyon, blow-job referencing days of the Clinton administration, when Sex in the City dominated the small screen and Foxy Brown defiled the airwaves. In his first move as FCC chair, Martin plans to sew Howard Stern’s mouth shut.