Well, she does very much resemble a Bond villain, so perhaps we shouldn't be surprised that court documents have come to light revealing that Lady Gaga considers herself to be the queen of the universe. (Sadly, Gaga, the Internet would disagree.) The woman who also calls herself Mother Monster (could it be more obvious?) is currently being sued for unpaid overtime by her former assistant Jennifer O’Neill, who alleges that she's owed $393,000, plus damages, for 7,168 hours.
Gaga's retort? As reported by the Post, Stefani Germanotta has adopted the "hood rat" defense, whose precedent can be found in every daytime TV court show ever. "[O'Neill is as] fucking hood rat who is suing me for money that she didn't earn ... She thinks she's just, like, the queen of the universe ... And, you know what, she didn't want to be a slave to one, because in my work and what I do, I'm the queen of the universe every day."
Way to keep it classist, Gags. The above quotes, and all of the batshit ones that shall follow, were taken from the Lady's videotaped August 6 deposition on the matter, in which she explained: that she doesn't pay any of her employees overtime; that O'Neill was well aware of this fact; that though her assistants need to be available around the clock, their daily work amounts to about eight hours; and that the perks of the job make up for this.
For instance: "She slept in Egyptian cotton sheets every night, in five-star hotels, on private planes, eating caviar, partying with [photographer] Terry Richardson all night, wearing my clothes, asking YSL [Yves Saint Laurent] to send her free shoes without my permission, using my YSL discount without my permission ... It is, like, such an amazing luxury that I get to travel the world and have planes, she doesn’t even see what a luxury it is."
Gaga explained that the night before she bought her workers a "beautiful $3,000 meal" at Spiaggia in Chicago because, "they were on their day off, and they all just wanted to be with me." Also, "I'm quite wonderful to everybody that works for me, and I am completely aghast to what a disgusting human being that you have become to sue me like this," she said to O'Neill, who'd she'd also just accused of staring at her "like a witch this whole time."
She also had complaints about services rendered by the assistant, who was being paid $75,000 per year. "She would only open a couple of bags, and it was very stressful for me ... because, you know, I weigh 115 pounds, and I was trying to move these huge, big luggages all by myself in the room ... by the way, she was asleep until 12:00 most of the time, so I was very often waking up and moving my own luggage and doing shit by myself."
And: While others “would, like, set up my room, and I would know where my clothes were, I would know where my toothbrush was, I would know where my soap and everything was, [O’Neill] got lazy — she didn’t always do those things for me ... I can’t walk down the street and go buy myself toiletries, I have to call security, I’ve got to call Jen or now I've got to call Wendi, I’ve got to get a whole bunch of people together to help me fix the problem."
Who can't identify with that? It's the little things, you know.