Within a week, we've had a new Death Grips song, a mashup with DuckTales video-game music, and a cover of "Guillotine" by a choir. And what began as a weird August for SPIN's 2012 Artist of the Year with their Lollapalooza no-show now comes to a close with an amazing old-school infomercial that wants you to buy a Death Grips greatest hits compilation.
Posted to YouTube by SenorVideoJuegos, the sales pitch for the phony LP, For Noided Eyes Only, is quite convincing: "You'll tap your foot to MC Ride's soulful voice and Zach Hill's rhythmic drumming." The ad then boasts of the reasonable cost ($12.95 plus shipping and handling) before scrolling through a selection of Sacramento noise-rap group's hits, which can indeed make on a bit "noided."
To "order," you can call 1-800-I-AM-NOIDED, but spoiler alert: It's actually a phone sex line that offers up your choice of "anything goes" VIP ladies. Also, at the very end, you'll notice this amazing fine print (and you really should call your gramma):
Disclaimer text that you won't read. Who actually reads this stuff? I really don't know. In fact, who actually buys crap from infomercials anymore? Well, besides your senile old gram. Speaking of which, you should call her. She probably doesn't even know what planet she's on, but I'm sure she'll appreciate that you called her at that piss-reeked old folks home.