First! Apropos of nothing, Bon Jovi have released a widely panned new album that you didn't buy. But 101,000 other people did buy it, according to Nielsen SoundScan, so What About Now is currently the No. 1 album in the country. The Billboard chart-topping champion finds the aging rawk band "splic[ing] elements of U2, contemporary country, Coldplay, finger-plucked folk, and, yes, Bruce Springsteen into a monochromatic dirge," according to Allmusic. Come on. Like SPIN was gonna review that one:
2 to 10: David Bowie is in at No. 2 with a long-player we actually did weigh in on. Although our scribe Alfred Soto called The Next Day "an album that didn't need to be made," we're glad that 85,000 humans disagreed enough to purchase the thing and give the Duke a late-career bump. Shockingly, this is the highest Bowie has ever charted in the Billboard 200, with 1976's utterly masterful Station to Station coming the closest at No. 3. Country knucklehead Luke Bryan dips from No. 1 to No. 3 for Spring Break...Here to Party (61K), and Atlanta's massive Passion Conference scores a No. 4 for the worshipful live set Passion: Let the Future Begin (48K). Bruno Mars' Unorthodox Jukebox slips down to No. 5 (43K), while black boy band Mindless Behavior debuts at an impressive No. 6 with All Around the World (37K). In at No. 7 is Eric Clapton with his 20th album Old Sock (37K). Paul McCartney features on that set, as well as the one we're most excited about: Dave Grohl's Sound City: Real to Reel makes the list at No. 8 (37K). And then comes Mumford and Sons' Babel (31K, No. 9) — just stop already — and Jimi Hendrix's People, Hell and Angels (30K, No. 10)
Oh, you fancy? Billboard is projecting that Justin Timberlake's ambitious, grown-ass new album The 20/20 Experience is on track for a massive debut — anywhere between 750,000 and 800,000 units moved. That would make the set the biggest sales week for an album by a solo male since Lil Wayne's 2011 Tha Carter IV. Better dust off that suit and tie.
Bow to Baauer: That's exactly what we should be doing, since his "Harlem Shake" has been the only thing keeping Macklemore & Ryan Lewis' deplorable "Thrift Shop" from the No. 1 slot in the Hot 100 for five weeks. With the dance meme dropping off considerably week to week (from 48 million streams down to 28 million in this last frame), we're dangerously close to awarding Mack with biggest-song-in-the-country status. "Thrift" has now notched 10 weeks on top of digital sales, and we're pretty much out of jokes about used clothes, especially since Clapton stole our thunder this week.