Imagine going back in time to a year ago or so, and explaining to your past self that the following passage would make complete sense: A week and a half before Donald Trump was sworn in as president of the United States, BuzzFeed published a dossier of documents compiled by an anonymous British intelligence agent, which alleged, among other things, that he once hired a group of prostitutes to urinate on the bed of the presidential suite at the Moscow Ritz Carlton. This embarrassing anecdote made the inaugural committee’s choice of port-a-potty provider for the big event–Don’s Johns, the D.C. area’s premiere source plastic bathroom–a little too easy to poke fun at. And so organizers responded by covering the logo for each presidential pisser with tape.
It’s sounds like a joke, but it’s true. The racist peepee diaper man is now our president. The Republicans control both houses of Congress. For the next four or eight years, they will dismantle what remains of the welfare state and strip away every recent civil rights gain they can get their hands on, starting with Obama’s executive orders on immigration. If the president keeps his word, Muslims will be placed on watchlists and banned from entering the country. The Democratic party has no idea how it is going to fight back. Things are very, very bad.
Peepee jokes won’t change any of that, but in dark times, humor is an important thing. So we salute whomever stripped the white tape from one john in John Marshall Memorial Park, just off the parade route. Here’s what all of the potties around it looked like:
And here is the object of one brave American’s patriotic vandalism.
Take that, piss boy.
